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Today Funny Fishing Quotes ideas
“Catching a fish is as incidental to fishing as making babies is to fucking.”
@William Humphrey
“A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other.”
@Samuel Johnson
“One thing becomes clearer as one gets older and one’s fishing experience increases, and that is the paramount importance of one’s fishing companions.”
@John Ashley Cooper
“There are always new places to go fishing. For any fisherman, there’s always a new place, always a new horizon.”
@Jack Nicklaus
“There is no greater fan of fly fishing than the worm.”
@Patrick K. McManus
“The solution to any problem — work, love, money, whatever is to go fishing, and the worse the problem, the longer the trip should be.”
@John Gierach
“The trout do not rise in the cemetery, so you better do your fishing while you are still able.”
@Sparse Grey Hackle
“The Polynesians used to have a system where they proclaimed a fishing area as ‘taboo.’ If any fisherman was caught fishing in a taboo area, they would be killed. The Polynesians understood that the fish had to be given a chance to recover.”
@Paul Watson
“Often I have been exhausted on trout streams, uncomfortable, wet, cold, briar scarred, sunburned, mosquito bitten, but never, with a fly rod in my hand have I been less than in a place that was less than beautiful.”
@Charles Kuralt
“The fishing is a great relief for me. When I’m out there’s no cell phone ringing. I’m out there fishing with bears. I’m in the middle of God’s country catching tons of fish. I just absolutely love it.”
@Rich Barry
“I used to like fishing because I thought it had some larger significance. Now I like fishing because it’s the one thing I can think of that probably doesn’t.”
@John Gierach
“Once I retire and slow down, I don’t want to be in New York. I want to be somewhere near a lake or a pond, so that on my days when I have nothing to do, I can go fishing.”
@Sharon Jones
“I go fishing not to find myself but to lose myself.”
@Joseph Monniger
“Like they say, you can learn more from a guide in one day than you can in three months fishing alone.”
@Mario Lopez
“Fishing books should ooze from a riverbank, not rocket out of publisher’s offices in big cities.”
@Neil Patterson
“In every species of fish I’ve angled for, it is the ones that have got away that thrill me the most, the ones that keep fresh in my memory. So I say it is good to lose fish. If we didn’t, much of the thrill of angling would be gone.”
@Ray Bergman
“To paraphrase a deceased patriot, I regret that I have only one life to give to my fly-fishing.”
@Robert Traver
“If your concentration is getting bad, take up bass fishing. It will really improve your ability to focus. If you aren’t ready when that fish hits, you can’t set the hook.”
@Lee Trevino
“There are only two occasions when Americans respect privacy, especially in Presidents. Those are prayer and fishing.”
@Herbert Hoover
“If fishing is interfering with your business, give up your business.”
@Sparse Grey Hackle
Short Funny Fishing Sayings
“Our tradition is that of the first man who sneaked away to the creek when the tribe did not really need fish.”
@Roderick Haig-Brown
“I get out in my boat and go fishing inshore and offshore”
@Rickie Fowler
“I’ve managed to convince my wife that somewhere in the Bible it says, “Man cannot have too many shotguns and fishing poles.”
@General Norman Schwarzkopf
“I do fish. I think there is a connection between thinking and fishing mostly because you spend a lot of time up to your waist in water without a whole lot to keep your mind busy.”
@Anthony Doerr
“Everyone should believe in something. I believe I’ll go fishing.”
@Henry David Thoreau
“Fishing is not an escape from life, but often a deeper immersion into it.”
@Harry Middleton
“All Americans believe that they are born fishermen. For a man to admit a distaste for fishing would be like denouncing mother-love or hating moonlight.”
@John Steinbeck
“Fishing is a hard job. Fishing at night. Rain. Day, night… You have to be wise and smart. And quick.”
@Mariano Rivera
“We ask a simple question And that is all we wish: Are fishermen all liars? Or do only liars fish?”
@William Sherwood Fox
“Anytime I can sneak in a moment to fish and ride horses, I’m a happy camper!”
@George Foreman
“People who fish for food, and sport be damned, are called pot-fishermen. The more expert ones are called crack pot-fishermen. All other fishermen are called crackpot fishermen. This is confusing.”
@Alexander Gurman
“Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in. I drink at it; but while I drink I see the sandy bottom and detect how shallow it is. Its thin current slides away, but eternity remains.”
@Henry David Thoreau
“Most fishermen use the double haul to throw their casting mistakes further.”
@Lefty Kreh
“There will be days when the fishing is better than one’s most optimistic forecast, others when it is far worse. Either is a gain over just staying home.”
@Roderick Haig-Brow
“Fly fishermen are born honest, but they get over it.”
@Ed Zern
“There is only one reason in the world to go fishing: to enjoy yourself. Anything that detracts from enjoying yourself is to be avoided.”
@Leigh Perkins
“Even eminent chartered accountants are known, in their capacity as fishermen, blissfully to ignore differences between seven and 10 inches, half a pound and two pounds, three fish and a dozen fish.”
@William Sherwood Fox
“The solution to any problem — work, love, money, whatever — is to go fishing, and the worse the problem, the longer the trip should be.”
@John Gierach
“All fishermen are liars; it’s an occupational disease with them like housemaid’s knee or editor’s ulcers.”
@Beatrice Gray Cook
“The season is ended. There was not enough of it; there never is.”
@Nick Lyons
Famous Funny Quotes about Fish
“All you need to be a fisherman is patience and a worm.”
@Herb Shriner
“The only thing bad about winning the pennant is that you have to manage the All-Star Game the next year. I’d rather go fishing for three years.”
@Whitey Herzog
“The best fisherman I know try not to make the same mistakes over and over again; instead they strive to make new and interesting mistakes and to remember what they learned from them.”
@John Gierach
“The great charm of fly-fishing is that we are always learning.”
@Theodore Gordon
“Most of the world is covered by water. A fisherman’s job is simple: Pick out the best parts.”
@Charles Waterman
“The fish is not so much your quarry as your partner.”
@Arnold Gingrich
“Of all the liars among mankind, the fisherman is the most trustworthy.”
@William Sherwood Fox
“The finest gift you can give to any fisherman is to put a good fish back, and who knows if the fish that you caught isn’t someone else’s gift to you?”
@Lee Wulff
“Most fishermen swiftly learn that it’s a pretty good rule never to show a favorite spot to any fisherman you wouldn’t trust with your wife.”
@John Voelker
“The charm of fishing is that it is the pursuit of what is elusive but attainable, a perpetual series of occasions for hope.”
@John Buchan
“He told us about Christ’s disciples being fisherman, and we were left to assume…that all great fishermen on the Sea of Galilee were fly fisherman and that John, the favorite, was a dry-fly fisherman.”
@Norman Maclean
“The best time to go fishing is when you can get away.”
@Robert Traver
“Grant me the Serenity to accept the size of the fish I catch, the Courage not to lie about it, and the Wisdom to know that none of my fishing buddies would believe me anyway.”
@Fisherman’s Prayer
“The angling fever is a very real disease and can only be cured by the application of cold water and fresh, untainted air.”
@Theodore Gordon
“I’m going to gut you like a fish.”
@Mike Tyson
“The angler forgets most of the fish he catches, but he does not forget the streams and lakes in which they are caught.”
@Charles K. Fox
“The fish you release maybe a gift to another, as it may have been a gift to you.”
@Lee Wulff
“Some go to church and think about fishing, others go fishing and think about God.”
@Tony Blake
“So long, and thanks for all the fish.”
@Douglas Adams
“Probably fishing is my passion.”
@Luke Bryan
Daily Fish Puns Quotes
“May the holes in your net be no larger than the fish in it.”
@Irish Blessing
“Opportunities are everywhere and so you must always let your hook be hanging. When you least expect it, a great fish will swim by.”
@Og Mandino
“If you want to catch more fish, use more hooks.”
@George Allen
“Most anglers, especially tyros, false cast too often. Three false casts should be sufficient for any throw and two is better. One is perfect.”
@Joe Brooks
“If I fished only to capture fish, my fishing trips would have ended long ago.”
@Zane Grey
“Many of us probably would be better fishermen if we did not spend so much time watching and waiting for the world to become perfect.”
@Norman Maclean
“Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish. Do not overo it.”
@Lao Tzu
“Many of the most highly publicized events of my presidency are not nearly as memorable or significant in my life as fishing with my daddy.”
@Jimmy Carter
“Fear No Fish, Never Grow up.”
@Flip Pallot
“Lots of people committed crimes during the year who would not have done so if they had been fishing. The increase of crime is among those deprived of the regenerations that impregnate the mind and character of the fisherman.”
@Herbert Hoover
“I fish, therefore I don’t golf.”
@Billy Connolly
“It is you and clean, flowing water. It is you, inquisitive, in a wild world that is older than man, seeking greater understanding and finding not only an endless interest but a tranquility that comes, most of the time, to all nature’s wild creatures.”
@Lee Wulff
“Some men would rather be photographed with their fish than with their wives.”
@Gwen Cooper
“It is not how abundant nor how considerable our catch be, but rather to the sport, and manner in which our quarry, the noble trout is angled.”
@J.B. Martin
“I only hope the fish will take half as much trouble for me as I’ve taken for them.”
@Rudyard Kipling
“It is not a fish until it is on the bank.”
@Old British saying
“I fish better with a lit cigar; some people fish better with talent.”
@Nick Lyons
“In the best stories about fly fishing … big fish are caught or lost; people say wild and spontaneous words; event becomes memory and sometimes, in the hands of a master, bleeds into art.”
@Nick Lyons
“Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.”
@Benjamin Franklin
“If I’m not going to catch anything, then I ‘d rather not catch anything on flies”
@Bob Lawless
Just Fishy Quotes Funny
“Game fish are too valuable to be caught only once.”
@Lee Wulff
“If fishing is a religion, fly fishing is high church.”
@Tom Brokaw
“One fish. Two fish. Red fish. Blue fish. Black fish. Blue fish. Old fish. New fish. This one has a little star. This one has a little car. Say! What a lot of fish there are.”
@Dr. Seuss
“I think I fish, in part, because it’s an anti-social, bohemian business that, when gone about properly, puts you forever outside the mainstream culture without actually landing you in an institution.”
@John Gierach
“If our father had his say, nobody who did not know how to catch a fish would be allowed to disgrace a fish by catching him.”
@Norman Maclean
“I object to fishing tournaments less for what they do to fish than what they do to fishermen.”
@Ted Williams
“Sell a man a fish, he eats for a day, teach a man how to fish, you ruin a wonderful business opportunity.”
@Karl Marx
“I marvel how the fishes live in the sea. Why, as men do a-land; the great ones eat up the little ones.”
@William Shakespeare
“Give a man a fish, and you’ll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he’ll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you’re a consultant.”
@Scott Adams
“I love talk and I love fishing. I’m having a ball.”
@Martin Milner
“Give a man a fish, and he can eat for a day. But teach a man how to fish, and he’ll be dead of mercury poisoning inside of three years.”
@Charlie Haas
“I love fishing. You put that line in the water and you don’t know what’s on the other end. Your imagination is under there.”
@Robert Altman
“Give a man a fish and he has food for a day. Teach him how to fish and you can get rid of him for the entire weekend.”
@Zenna Schaffer
“I like to fish. Fishing is always a way of relaxing.”
@Tom Felton
“Soon after I embraced the sport of angling I became convinced that I should never be able to enjoy it if I had to rely on the cooperation of the fish.”
@Sparse Grey Hackle
“I have laid aside business, and gone a’fishing.”
@Izaak Watson
“Fish are, of course, indispensable to the angler. They give him an excuse for fishing and justify the fly rod without which he would be a mere vagrant.”
@Sparse Grey Hackle
“I have fished through fishless days that I remember happily without regret.”
@Roderick Haig-Brown
“You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don’t want to eat the fish. They just want to make it late for something.”
@Mitch Hedberg
“Fly-fishing is the most fun you can have standing up.”
@Arnold Gingrich
“This planet is covered with sordid men who demand that he who spends time fishing shall show returns in fish.”
@Leonidas Hubbard, Jr.
“Fishing is not an escape from life, but often a deeper immersion into it…”
@Harry Middleton
“The fish and I were both stunned and disbelieving to find ourselves connected by a line.”
@William Humphrey
“Fishing is much more than fish. It is the great occasion when we may return to the fine simplicity of our forefathers.”
@Herbert Hoover
“Something to think about: If you fish the wrong fly long and hard enough, it will sooner or later become the right fly.”
@John Gierach
“Fishing is a discipline in the equality of men – for all men are equal before fish.”
@Herbert Hoover
“Do not tell fish stories where the people know you. Particularly, don’t tell them where they know the fish.”
@Mark Twain
“By the time I had turned thirty, I’d realized two important things. One, I had to fish. Two, I had to work for a living.”
@Mallory Burton
“It has always been my private conviction that any man who pits his intelligence against a fish and loses has it coming.”
@John Steinbeck
“Be patient and calm – for no one can catch fish in anger.”
@Herbert Hoover
“Hatchery fish have the same colours, but they always seem muted like bad reproductions of great art.”
@Bill Barich
“The gods do not deduct from man’s allotted span the hours spent in fishing.”
@Ancient Babylonian Proverb
“Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after.”
@Henry David Thoreau
“I think there is a connection between thinking and fishing mostly because you spend a lot of time up to your waist in water without a whole lot to keep your mind busy.”
@Anthony Doerr
“I don’t want to sit at the head table anymore. I want to go fishing.”
@George Bush
“If you think I’m pathetic for spending all this money to mount my prize catches just to impress people, you should see how much I pay the guy who catches them.”
@Lukas Saunders
“Three-fourths of the Earth’s surface is water, and one-fourth is land. It’s quite clear that the good Lord intended us to spend triple the amount of time fishing as taking care of the lawn.”
@Chuck Clark
“When I go fishing, I like to know that there’s nobody within five miles of me.”
@Norman MacCaig
“It is to be observed that ‘angling’ is the name given to fishing by people who can’t fish.”
@Stephen Leacock
“There will be no end to angling controversies for there is no one best way for everyone to fish.”
@Lee Wulff
“I’ve gone fishing thousands of times in my life, and I have never once felt unlucky or poorly paid for those hours on the water.”
@William Tapply
“I am firmly convinced that the ideal combination leading to a happy life is to have the time to both fish and read.”
@Brian Murphy
“Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn’t go to the colleges… he got guys off the fishing docks.”
@Jeff Foxworthy
“There’s a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot.”
@Steven Wright
“My biggest worry is that when I’m dead and gone, my wife will sell my fishing gear for what I said I paid for it.”
@Koos Brandt
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